God's child

It's a bit odd sometimes having young parents. I guess I really didn't notice it all that much growing up, but now being more than half their ages, its just weird. My dad will be forty years old in February; I'm twenty-two. In appearance we look more like brothers than father and son. So much so, he tends to ask every waitress or cashier what our relationship is; he gets quite a kick out of it. But I just feel awkward sometimes. I'm sure in part is because my parents divorced when I was six and that I moved out of my Mom's house at sixteen, but still it's awkward just the same. I am not extremely close with either of my parents, though I've always been pretty close to my mom. Genetically, I can see in both my mom and dad the traits I’ve inherited and such: sensitivity from my mom, cocky humor and wit from my dad. Sometimes I wish I had a closer relationship with my dad. Sometimes I think how nice it would be to be able to open to my dad and just talk with him about anything and everything; to seek advice and counsel, confidence and encouragement. It's nice to go and mountain bike with my dad and stuff, but sometimes I just feel more grown up than he is; how young and arrogant of me. I think it’s just that this that I would like from my dad is that which I once had with my grandfather. Growing up my grandfather was always there for me; He taught me, He inspired me, He encouraged me. It was from him that I gained my character, my generosity, my need for adventure; oh, the tales I have to tell. It is a goal of mine to write these adventures one day; one day. Sometimes remembering the past brings endurance for tomorrow; tomorrow brings new adventures to soon remember. Father, let me always be close to the children you one day give me; let us have grand adventures...

Remembering Grace

One of the greatest parts of life is being faced with what seems to be an insurmountable challenge and then through grace and sheer heart pounding, sweat breaking determination what once seemed impossible resides only as a gleeful memory of triumph. God’s sense of humor and timing of trials tends to bring forth an inner laughter in my laugh. It must be the same type laughter that Sarah let loose as an angel told her she would finally become a mother at ninety; I’m not quite sure but it just seems so similar. My papers are finished for this fall semester and as always it was but by the grace of God, which is quite frankly the underlying theme of my entire life and existence. So like usual I had planned to write my papers at the end of the semester and by the end of Thanksgiving break I was well on my way to a little chip shot up to the green and putt to make par without breaking a sweat; haha right. So during my break I had written a little over eighteen of the twenty pages that were due the following Wednesday, with only five pages of content to go on an exegetical due Tuesday, and then a super easy 5 page church evangelism strategy deal due Thursday; piece of cake. Well Monday morning I found myself sitting in class on time for once and had an urge from within to back up all the work I had done on break to my jump drive. So I dug through my bag, but just could not find the drive, so I decided I’d do it later… Well, go figure the urge was God giving a bit of warning as usual because less than an hour later I felt my hear sink as my computer gave up the ghost. On the outside I believe I was somewhat calm, but inside I felt as if I had just stepped out of an airplane at ten thousand feet with a defective parachute. Apparently, the once easy chip shot was now to be made in a raging hurricane and then only if I could borrow someone else’s wedge. One would think having an expensive computer die unexpectedly would more or less suck, but no, oh no I wasn’t worried much about the computer at all really, I’m they are replaceable, but the hours, upon hours invested in eighteen pages of one the hardest assignments I’ve ever had, that was to say the least, a bit frightening. But even through all this, I knew my God is bigger than any of these “little” problems so I Pressed on getting what needed to be done, done. For some reason every thing that so worried me about the situation seemed to dim and have little phasing effect upon me; every time I thought, “how can I get this all done?” God reminded me of all He had done before:

"Alex, remember how I took care of tuition? Alex, remember how I took care of your car? Alex, remember how I gave you a place to live? Alex, remember and have faith I Am bigger than anything you will ever face; I will get you through."

By Tuesday I had finished the exegetical and went to a computer repair shop to see if maybe, just maybe, my computers hard drive might possibly still have those papers I really did not want to or have time to rewrite. The time at the store seemed like an eternity and a half as the computer lady attempted to access the needed information. Time and again it just did not work; I think it’s been quite a while since I’ve prayed as hard as I did that day. Finally she found that my hard drive worked! And by God’s wonderful and continuous grace my papers were recovered. I’m not quite sure if anyone has ever felt so blessed after their computer has broken. God I remember; help me never to forget and let me always live in Your grace...

Is "dork" even a popular term anymore?

If per say someone, not me of course but; a um, friend of mine, yeah a friend of mine, would on occasion happen to have the inner desire to make fun of myself, I mean himself, because I; He! just tends to act like a dork most of the time; does that make m, him crazy? Yeah, yeah so on the inside I find a lot of humor in the fact in how much of a dork I act like, ok am, how much a dork I am. I mean writing this just proves the point doesn't it? Still yet again another example; apparently according to this one youth pastor I know, cough, Danny, who I recently; yesterday, went and spoke at a lock in for said I tend to use the words "I mean" quite frequently when preaching: it's better than saying "ughmmm" though isn’t it? I mean; haha just kidding, though I probably should look back on my writing to see how many times my fingers use the phrase "I mean." Anyways, I've had this passion and desire for a while to start a traveling evangelistic youth ministry deal where I go and speak at youth events and fun stuff like that. I'm not really sure how one starts such a ministry; I guess I’ll find out though because lately God has been convicting me a bit on how passive I am in certain areas of my life. So God says to me, Alex stop being a pansy and be a man (1 kings 2:2 "...be thou strong therefore, and shew thyself a man." See, there is a Biblical basis why there is no crying in baseball.) Yeah so there are a few things in life I've to quit being afraid of (once again making fun of my self in my head: "I’m such a girl.") and just step up to the plate and swing instead of watching everything go by. Well, back to me being a dork, so this whole concept popped in my head today while driving. Usually when I'm driving for hours on end I'm by myself, and usually I spend a good hour or so hitting the scan button on the radio and then "singing" the song attempting at times to guess the lyrics I don't know, oldies and Motown are preferable, Christian and country songs are easier, but they work too. Yeah, so that being said my thought in the car was "It would be quite nice if I had someone to go with me places" (which is dork for a wife.) But, then I thought if someone were riding with me and I was putting on this concert of hits from today, yesterday, and bunches of years ago they would probably look at me as if I were a loon of a dork. (Loon of a dork? That doesn’t even make sense.) Yeah, but hey, I probably am. I think I need sleep; I’m rambling like Donald Miller. Though in his ramblings He did have a really awesome quote about the beauty in God holding all the stars and knowing what He’s doing; though a dork I may be; watching the stars over Georgia tonight as a drove through the dark mountain foothills reminds me that God loves me still.

Deborah Theory

In a matter of strong dogmatism to the degree of a pit-bull with juicy steak; there seems to be much less fuzziness in the Bible in its teachings against women in roles of spiritual leadership and authority over men. With that statement I’m sure I have encouraged a few set of cross hairs upon my brow and probably is a good indication as to why I am single, but this concept must be understood with great humility and gentleness both as this author is a male and by the females who might choke or rebel upon being contended in her belief structure over this heated issue.

One may misinterpret this theory and find the author to be a male chauvinistic pig, so let it be said that this is not a debate over equality issues between men and women in value. As far as value goes the Bible is clear: women are far more valuable than men. (“Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.” Proverbs 31:10.)

Concerning any topic one's theology must be consistent or else you may find that your conclusions are based on experiences rather than a consistent Biblical footing or dancing around an issue by stating is a "great and indiscernible mystery." In most all debates such as this there can be but only one right answer and I am quite timid on proclaiming that Deborah Theory is 100% God's view on the matter but I am in humbly reserved in thinking that I am not that far off on this issue. The research that spawned Deborah Theory has come from the basic yet direly relevant question of today: Should women be pastors? Deborah Theory seeks to answer that question as well and give a basic overview of a women's role in Christianity, firmly rooted in a rebuttal stance on the subject of Deborah's role as a Judge in Judges 4.

In seeking to understand the role of men and women one must first start at the dawn of existence in the opening chapters of Genesis.

And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul…And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh…
Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life; Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field; In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return. And Adam called his wife's name Eve; because she was the mother of all living. (Genesis 2:7,18-24, 3:16-20)

In Genesis we find the account of creation of the man from the dust of the earth and the breath of God and then later God forms a counterpart for Adam out from Adam in essence signify that this is not a different creature, but at the same time it is. The passage continues to give information about marriage and the marriage union. It must be noted that Eve was not created with a lesser value than Adam but she was created after, from, and for Adam who also gave her, her name (a practice continuing today in marriage of the bride receiving the groom’s surname) signifying his leadership in the family unit.

The third chapter of Genesis expounds upon the fall of man into sin. Here it is important to examine the aftermath of the event in that of the cursing. God’s cursing of Adam and Eve greater reveal their roles to each other and in life. Adam because he disobeyed God by allowing her to eat of the tree as well as par take of it himself is defined as primary provider and protector of his family. Eve on the other hand is situated as her primary role as a mother and is put under the strict authority of her husband. But what does all that have to do with Deborah’s situation in the book of Judges?

The story of Deborah is quite familiar and popular as a Children’s Bible story. The setting is that of the Promised Land during a period after the time of Joshua and prior to the rule of the Kings of Israel. This time is commonly referred to the time of the Judges hence the Biblical title. The basic happenings of the book is perpetual occurrence of repetition of Israel’s fall into sin, attack or occupation by pagan nation (which was suppose to have been done away with under Joshua’s leadership,) and then eventual repentance and deliverance. During this time of occupation and then repentance God would usually call out one termed a “judge” to lead the nation and deliver the people from oppression.

And Deborah, a prophetess, the wife of Lapidoth, she judged Israel at that time. And she dwelt under the palm tree of Deborah between Ramah and Bethel in mount Ephraim: and the children of Israel came up to her for judgment. And she sent and called Barak the son of Abinoam out of Kedeshnaphtali, and said unto him, Hath not the LORD God of Israel commanded, saying, Go and draw toward mount Tabor, and take with thee ten thousand men of the children of Naphtali and of the children of Zebulun? And I will draw unto thee to the river Kishon Sisera, the captain of Jabin's army, with his chariots and his multitude; and I will deliver him into thine hand. And Barak said unto her, If thou wilt go with me, then I will go: but if thou wilt not go with me, then I will not go. And she said, I will surely go with thee: notwithstanding the journey that thou takest shall not be for thine honour; for the LORD shall sell Sisera into the hand of a woman. And Deborah arose, and went with Barak to Kedesh. And Barak called Zebulun and Naphtali to Kedesh; and he went up with ten thousand men at his feet: and Deborah went up with him. (Judges 4:4-10)

Upon first glance the passage seems straight forward: The woman in charge tells the general to take care of the bad guys because God will give them victory, but the general doubts her “prophetic order” and explains how he will not go unless she accompanies him which is obviously because he has little faith in God and is afraid to go against their adversaries, so she aggress to go with him but says the victory will lie in the hands of a woman and that is how it happens. That is what the passage in Judges is saying is it not? I mean that is the story I heard as a little kid so it must be right. So right there is a spectacular example of God’s use and blessing of a woman in a high ranking leadership position or is it? let us delve a bit deeper into this text beyond first glance and try to find the proper understanding of this text in the Biblical context.

There are three key things in the first sentence of this passage that dictates the theme of the rest of the story. First, we find that Deborah is a prophetess and there is nothing wrong with that. There are many occurrences in scripture where God has ordained certain women as prophetesses in both Old and New Testaments (Miriam, Exodus 15:20 ; Huldah, 2 Kings 22:14 ; Anna, Luke 2:36) as well as there being false prophetesses (Noadiah, Nehemiah 6:14.) So it is understood she is a prophetess, meaning she speaks for God when He calls her to.

Secondly, Deborah is married to a man named Lapidoth. Too often have I heard how Deborah was a judge over Israel because her husband Lapidoth refused or declined the position; why else would he be mentioned in the text? In all honesty coming to that conclusion is a result from nothing else but egregious exegesis. If one does a study on women mentioned in the Bible there is a common occurrence; nearly every time a woman is listed and every time a true prophetess is mentioned she is associated to the male authority figure over her and in one instance found in Romans 16:1 where it seems no male authority figure is available for Phebe so instead she is associated with her home church having authority over her. (Phebe is another widely used argument for women to serve as Deacons in the church because of an attempt to mistranslate the Greek word diakonos, transliterated Deacon, but in this case translated servant as in many other instances. Paul only uses diakonos to mean Deacon when talking about the office which is only to be held by men as prescribe in Phillipians 1:1, 1 Timothy 3:8,12.)

Thirdly, in this passage it is stated that “she judged Israel at this time.” But what is so important about that? Well, here one must again look into the context of the book of Judges and examine just exactly how one becomes a Judge.

And when the children of Israel cried unto the LORD, the LORD raised up a deliverer to the children of Israel, who delivered them, even Othniel the son of Kenaz, Caleb's younger brother. And the Spirit of the LORD came upon him, and he judged Israel, and went out to war: and the LORD delivered Chushanrishathaim king of Mesopotamia into his hand; and his hand prevailed against Chushanrishathaim. (Judges 3:9-10)

But when the children of Israel cried unto the LORD, the LORD raised them up a deliverer, Ehud the son of Gera, a Benjamite, a man lefthanded: and by him the children of Israel sent a present unto Eglon the king of Moab. (Judges 3:15)

And after him was Shamgar the son of Anath, which slew of the Philistines six hundred men with an ox goad: and he also delivered Israel (Judges 3:31) (not an Israelite, rather a pagan)

And the children of Israel cried unto the LORD: for he had nine hundred chariots of iron; and twenty years he mightily oppressed the children of Israel. And Deborah, a prophetess, the wife of Lapidoth, she judged Israel at that time. And she dwelt under the palm tree of Deborah between Ramah and Bethel in mount Ephraim: and the children of Israel came up to her for judgment. (Judges 4:3-5)

That the LORD sent a prophet unto the children of Israel, which said unto them, Thus saith the LORD God of Israel, I brought you up from Egypt, and brought you forth out of the house of bondage; And I delivered you out of the hand of the Egyptians, and out of the hand of all that oppressed you, and drave them out from before you, and gave you their land; And I said unto you, I am the LORD your God; fear not the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but ye have not obeyed my voice. (Judges 6:8-10) (not a judge but God sent a prophet)

And there came an angel of the LORD, and sat under an oak which was in Ophrah, that pertained unto Joash the Abiezrite: and his son Gideon threshed wheat by the winepress, to hide it from the Midianites. And the angel of the LORD appeared unto him, and said unto him, The LORD is with thee, thou mighty man of valour. (Judges 6:11-12)

And after Abimelech there arose to defend Israel Tola the son of Puah, the son of Dodo, a man of Issachar; and he dwelt in Shamir in mount Ephraim. And he judged Israel twenty and three years, and died, and was buried in Shamir. (Judges 10:1-2)

And after him arose Jair, a Gileadite, and judged Israel twenty and two years. (Judges 10:3)

Then the Spirit of the LORD came upon Jephthah, and he passed over Gilead, and Manasseh, and passed over Mizpeh of Gilead, and from Mizpeh of Gilead he passed over unto the children of Ammon. (Judges 11:29)

And after him Ibzan of Bethlehem judged Israel. (Judges 12:8)

And after him Elon, a Zebulonite, judged Israel; and he judged Israel ten years. (Judges 12:11)

And after him Abdon the son of Hillel, a Pirathonite, judged Israel. (Judges 12:13)

And the woman bare a son, and called his name Samson: and the child grew, and the LORD blessed him. And the Spirit of the LORD began to move him at times in the camp of Dan between Zorah and Eshtaol. (Judges 13:24-25)

Those are the passages dealing with all of the Judges and how they attained their position as Judge. Now it is quite interesting to examine these different verses comparing and contrasting them. One stark difference does tend to stand out among the various Judges: Some are indicated as called by God and others seem to have just taken the position. Looking back at the call of Deborah we find that though she was a prophetess, much like the prophet mentioned in Judges 6:8-10, she has no special call of God upon her to be a Judge and to take leadership of Israel.

Though the evidence provided so far may seem somewhat plausible it gets more interesting. In order to understand any Biblical passage fully one must search the entirety of the Scriptures to examine every reference concerning any given scriptural concept. Looking across into the New Covenant one finds the most convincing evidence concerning the story of Deborah and her role as a Judge.

And what shall I more say? for the time would fail me to tell of Gedeon, and of Barak, and of Samson, and of Jephthae; of David also, and Samuel, and of the prophets. (Hebrews 11:32)

Now that is quite an interesting list of characters from Hebrews 11; commonly called the Hall of Faith and this verse gives a list of heroes, most of who are found in the book of Judges. But it is here that one finds an extremely interesting tidbit: why is it among Judges that Deborah is not mentioned, rather it is the so called “faithless and cowardly” Barak mentioned instead?

Alex Felton's Deborah Theory: The prophetess Deborah stepped out of God’s will for her life in taking the position of Judge over Israel during a time of spiritual crisis. Though she gives a prophecy to the General Barak to attack the enemy he is quite reluctant to venture off into battle knowing that Deborah is acting out of place as Judge over Israel. Still knowing her to be a prophet he wisely asked her to go with him as insurance over the lives of his men. Though the day was won by a woman as prophesied by Deborah it is Barak who lives on in the book of Hebrews Hall of Faith as the man who relied upon his God, rather than the illegitimate rule of Deborah.

For Love of the Game

What is the purpose of playing games? It seems rather likely that the first that will come to your mind in answering that question is the obvious: to win. Think about that though, do we play games with the sole purpose of winning? If that is the case then what is it about winning the we so desire? Is it the prideful feeling of victory? Is it relishing in the fact because your team won on Saturday you can rub it in your co-workers face on Monday? I mean there has to be a reason. What drives someone to use pine tar…err.. I mean have dirt on their pitching hand during the playoffs and World Series? Is it that winning is fun, prestigious, boastful, what? At times I’m sure I’ve fallen in to this mindset: why play if you’re not going to win? But that’s really not it at all. Playing a game is not and should not be about winning. We ought to play because we want to play because it’s fun! “Oh, but winning when you play is much more fun.” Well maybe, but then again maybe not for the team on the opposite side of the field. Playing the game is fun. Maybe I’m just a weird person but I like going into overtime because that is just more time to play the game. Even weirder, I don’t really like winning all the time; apparently I was dropped as a child a few too many times. Winning is good and all I mean don’t get me wrong I like to win, but if I’m playing against friends it’s cool when they win too. But I don’t necessarily play to win; I play to play. That’s probably why I like golf so much. In Golf one gets to play the entire round, whereas in team sports your either one the field or riding the pine or watching from the sidelines. I’d rather be on the field playing and lose a game than watch from the sidelines and win the game, but that’s just me.

Fear where hath thou gone?

Fear is a matter that I have found to be less and less of a focal point in my life. It seems to me almost a matter I should have some concern over, I mean, is it not usually good to have a wee bit of a healthy fear of things that may inflict severe to possibly decapilatory bodily harm? Maybe, but then again what do we really have to fear? Roosevelt said something to the effect of "all there is to fear is fear itself." What does that even mean; it is impossible and illogical to fear fear; why that’s circular fear reasoning. As Christians we should realize and remember that God has not given us a spirit of fear, but it is important to be a bit cautious in our decision making. If then God has not given us a spirit of fear, who has? Is fear demonic? We are to fear God though are we not? It seems that fearing God is a bit different than actual fear; fear comes with a negative connotation embedded within and that is not the God I serve. We never under any circumstance should huddle crouched in the fetal position with our thumb in our mouth hiding out of sheer terror of God, nor should we fear his chastisement when we falter. I think we are called instead not to understand fearing God as dreading his omnipotence in erasing us off the face of the earth, but to hold fast to our God, to cling to Him, to know who He is in that He is God. Not a god, not some cosmic bouncer like body guard, and not some title to go run and hide behind; He is God, the Alpha and Omega, beginning and End. God is in control and He has control over even the smallest of stuff. I love when during His conversation with Pontius Pilate Jesus responds to Pilate in this passage:

Pilate said. "Don't you realize I have power either to free you or to crucify you?" Jesus answered, "You would have no power over me if it were not given to you from above... (John 19:10-11)

Do you think Pilate's mouth fell open speechless? I wouldn’t doubt it seeing as from that point on Pilate tried to Jesus off the hook. What then do we have to fear? Financial burdens? Family hardships? A loaded Colt 45 placed to our temple? None of those because my "fear" is not in the madman with his finger on the trigger, rather I submit my life to God and his protection and deliverance; the madman may hold the gun in his hand, but my God holds the inner workings of that pistol, let alone the anatomy of the madman's hand from becoming formless inoperable group. Should we then fear fear and put our focus on fear or should we put our focus on the omnipotent God. So now what shall we fear?

All this because I got a new bike, oh, and I’m still not too keen with heights…

God's humor...

So my birthday was last week and somehow I'm 22 now. It's funny how fast time goes by, I mean I can remember counting down the years till I could drive and now sometimes it feels like all I've done the past few years, not that I dislike driving. I once drove five hours Friday and five hours Sunday night every week for a year; I've driven about 45,000 miles over the last 3 years. But my birthday was very good though; my friends all got together and surprised me, well I knew something was up but still I was quite surprised, they took me out for dinner and then back to my apartment for cake and ice cream; it was really a great birthday. So the funny part about being 22 is still being single, epically seeing that all of my really close friends are married. But that's no big deal I've got a bit of patience, but God just has this sense of humor about Him, really it's quite funny. Take for example the ride to the restaurant on my 22nd birthday. My best friend is on the phone with a kid in the youth group from church checking up on him and he tells him it’s my birthday and hands me the phone. The conversation with this little 13 year old Venezuelan kid goes something like this:

kid - "happy birthday day, how old are you?"
me - "guess"
kid - "22"
me - "yep"
kid - "wow....22 and still single...."

How does one respond to that? With every ounce of wit in my body my best effort was dead silence. I mean what a birthday thought, but looking back it gives me a great story and something to laugh about. "Ha, ha God very funny," but God's humor doesn’t end there. The next night I'm in Tallahassee hanging out with my best friend and his wife at the Tallahassee mall sitting in the food court eating some mall Chinese. Then this older gentleman walks up; we had noticed him handing out tracts, he had noticed us pray over our food. He complimented us on our praying and then walked off. Two minutes later, He walked back over and said, "Which of you is called into the ministry?" My buddy and I both looked at each other, waiting for the other to say something since God has called us both, but seeing I'm in Bible College and all I replied, "I am." Never before had I had this happen to me so I waited in some form of shock and interest to what he said: "I don't do this often but I just felt the Lord leading me to come back here and tell you that your adversary the devil is going to come against your ministry and it will probably be through a woman." And then he walks away... For the second time in 24 hours all I have is silence. Here I am this 22 year old single guy waiting on the girl God has for my life and then I get a prophesy to be careful about a woman who could ruin my ministry, Praise God! I don't know, it's just all that funny to me, not that I would overlook a "word from God" for my life, but I won't let it imprison me in fear either.